SUPPOSED TO BE UPLOADED ON 1/20/2026. IF YOU SEE ANY OTHER DATE, IT'S WRONG! - Dr. Korsakov
U R 000000LD!!! - XxALL1CATxX
Sure, but you're not far behind, Al! You'd be 36 in June, making you closer to being an uncool middle-aged hag than ya think! - Jane
NOONONONONONONONONOONONONON -XXXALLICATWHATEVER
That managed to ward her off. Thank God. Anyway, you still here, reader? I wanted to tell you about my day. It was totally riveting, man. For my birthday, Allison surprised me with this crazy cool Cadillac Coupe DeVille. When she gave it to me, she even made it imperative to put emphasis on the year; 1973. She seemed really proud of herself when she showed up with this, I'm honestly kinda shocked she could even finance this. We both work dead-end jobs, and I've never seen her work a second one--- ah, what the hell, I should be appreciating her gift. I feel like a total douche now, just ignore everything I said previously, alright?
Anyway, she insisted we get the hell outta the apartment to go cruise around, so of course I agreed. I didn't even have anything to eat yet, but I figured we could stop and get snacks at a gas station on the way back.
So, I was driving, right? Then, all of a sudden, Allison grabs the wheel and nearly crashes us into a goddamned tree before frantically saying that we should go to Rocky Butte Park. When i asked her why, she said it was because Claude needed to take a piss--- which, I honestly still find hard to believe. How do dog owners know when their dogs need to pee anyway? Do they squeeze it? Or... something?
I'm going on a tangent. Oh yeah, of course I brought weed, space cadet. We smoked a little at the park, and that jive turkey finally managed to cool down after a while. We were there until the sun set... but you probably already knew that from using your eyes, didn'tcha?
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